Last night, when the Sabres came storming out of the gate, I came up with a really nifty idea for my post-game post. AND THEN DEREK SCORED, and that post became a little bit better.

BUT THEN THOSE IDIOTS FELL APART AGAIN.

So my plan was shot to hell, and my heart shattered, and now I don’t even know where to begin.

Well, I’ll begin with Tim Connolly, I suppose.

I’m seriously worried about this guy. Like, even though I don’t like to talk to my inside-the-Sabres source too, too much, because he really drives me crazy, I’m seriously tempted to call him and find out what’s going on. BUT, I don’t think he’d be able to tell me, but idk. If I decide it’s worth him pestering me all the time, I’ll give The Boy a call. Until then, we can speculate.

This is what Lindy had to say:

“Here’s what I’ll rule out: It has absolutely nothing to do with concussion; it has absolutely nothing to do with vertebrae. It’s brand new.

“It’s an injury that I don’t want to explain. It’s a tough one, and I don’t want to explain it. I give him a lot of credit for muscling his way through one game. If it was a groin injury, I’d tell you a groin because nobody’s going to go after his groin. If it’s an injury where I really think somebody could target, you don’t say anything.”

IS THAT SUPPOSED TO HELP ME COPE, LINDY??? BECAUSE IT’S NOT WORKING. Now, I’ll be the first person to rag on Timmy when he gets a stupid injury, or if he misses practice, or if he’s found passed out on the floor of the Snooty Fox, but in all actuality, I LOVE HIM TO DEATH. And I’m not ashamed to admit it. It’s embarrassing at times, yes, but even Danny Paille admitted that he has NKOTB on his iPod. Close enough.

And he thinks it’s that bad, to the point that it’s something that would make him a target?? Now, again, I’ll be the first person to say that Timmy won’t be here come July of 2010, BUT HE’S MY TIMMY. DON’T HURT HIM. Or you’ll quickly find yourself on my Hockey Player Hit List. I’ll have to tell you about it someday, but most of the people on it are there for knocking Tim into the next season.

Seriously, though, while reviewing a bunch of stuff for my Medical Terminology class, I decided to try to figure out what’s really wrong with Tim. The only things “musculoskeletal” that I could come up with, having to deal with the upper body, that could present itself as “a bruised chest,” were the following:

– BROKEN OR FRACTURED RIBS. That’s any crack or break, anywhere on the bone of a rib. They usually take 1-2 months to completely heal, since there’s nothing that can be done by a human to have any effect, really.

– COSTOCHONDRAL SEPARATION. These are a little more touchy. This occurs when the bone of the rib, in the middle ribs, separates from the cartilage attaching it to the sternum. Treatment for this can take up to 12 weeks, possibly more.

– The other possibility I can think of would be a cracked sternum. This would take a ridiculously long time to heal, just because of the thickness and strength of the bones in that area: the manubrium (the flatter, rounder, top portion of the sternum), the sternum, the xiphoid process (the small, pointy, lowest portion of the sternum), the ribs, and the clavicles. They’re very strong, and because of their function, it would take them a good amount of time to heal, and to heal properly.

I think the most likely would be the costochondral separation. But, since Tim’s injury is presenting as a bruised chest, I want to say that there’s at least one break or fracture. The break in a bone and leaking of bone marrow would give the appearance of a bruise.

I don’t know, though. It’s difficult to say. It really could be a number of things. Plus, I’m not too sure, just because Lindy’s scared. And if Lindy’s worried, then I definitely am.

Sorry I was boring you with medical talk. It actually allows me to study while I post, which is weird, and I’ll never do it again, I promise…

On to the Derek Roy Report.

Derek actually woke up this morning. SHOCKING. Because after that game, if I were him, I would’ve skipped this week, not last.

– Oh, hey! He’s talking about The System!! Another shock!
– He’s excited to play the Flyers, because of Marty and that like puke.
– He said that the practices can be short (45 minutes), up to 75-90 minutes.
– They are not allowed to have their cell phones on the ice.
– Has he ever checked out Rivet’s six-pack. “Is that serious? Yeah, he’s built.”
– If he could live forever, what would he live for? “For my family.” SUPER CUTE. MAJOR POINTS.
– He gets a Big Extra Meal with a side of chicken nuggets with sweet and sour sauce at McDonald’s.
– Derek doesn’t know what he’ll be wearing to Level on Saturday, and says he won’t be dancing.
– Funniest fan story? “I don’t know… Let me get back to you on that one.”
– How is Kyle? “He’s good, he’s good.” Apparently he wants his own show on Kiss.

THAT WAS LAME, TOO.

BUT WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO WORK WHEN COOL THINGS HAPPEN? KISS IS THROWING A PARTY FOR DEREK AT LEVEL NIGHT CLUB ON SATURDAY. That’s bull. I’m pissed. I mean, I suppose I could go after work, but of course my friend would have to be coming home from school on Saturday and she wants our group to go out for midnight pie, since that’s a bit of a tradition with us. And I’m not so sure if I said to this friend, “LET’S GO CLUBBING ‘CAUSE PRINCESS D IS OUT,” she’d be down with it. Sad.

And to the girl who asked D if Craig has a six-pack?? WAY TO MAKE HIM SEEM EVEN MORE GAY. I’m pretty sure all the guys do in the locker room is check each other out. BUT, I do think I should e-mail Janet and include Derek’s chunky monkey pic, and have her ask him if he has a six-pack, and when he says “yes,” confront him with that gem. Think it would work??

But I’d love to Craig’s six-pack any day. Hell, I’d pay to see it.

Yeah, that’s right, Craig. Because Derek said that on the air, you’re going to be hit on by teenagers and college students across Western New York. And all they’ll want to see are your abs. I can’t say I blame them, though.

Oh, and hey! While the Sabres can’t win, I’M SO GLAD THE PIRATES CAN. Thank God that one of my teams is playing consistantly. And you should definitely go seen the renovations Anne and S(h)ara have done to Sabretooth’s House. They’re glorious.

Alright, kids. I’m out. And by out, I mean at the dining room table, still studying, instead of going out in the 30-degree, snowy weather. So, stay warm, loves. And if anyone hears anything about Timmy, txt me, please?? Thanks dears!!

Advertisements